No.
Ignited in large part by last year’s murders of Breonna Taylor and George Floyd, America was forced into a moment of reckoning for its continued mistreatment of African-Americans in policing and throughout the criminal justice system. Black Lives Matter protests and demonstrations sprang up across the country to demand justice for their murders as well as calls for immediate changes to the societal systems that support and reinforce tragic outcomes for Black and Brown people.
In the end, did any of last summer’s strife make a difference?
I recently had a conversation with a friend about Guerneville. Let me preface this story by saying that I’ve known him for roughly 3-5 years and he’s always come across as a decent guy. He’s generally struck me as someone who is not racist in any way, and who is also fairly aware of the many racial problems facing our country.
He mentioned that he likes Guerneville because of the warmer weather and peaceful surroundings. I agreed, but also shared with him the sense of discomfort I have in Guerneville because of the encounters I’ve had here with a confederate flag sighting and the incident last year with the neighbor who stopped to question me as to why I was in the neighborhood taking pictures.
His response to my experiences quickly gave me my answer to my question about whether last summer’s protests made a difference.
He acknowledged that there are racist elements in Guerneville, but suggested that the flag could also have come from a redneck renter and not the homeowner. As for the situation with the neighbor who sought to question my motives for being in the neighborhood, he immediately took the position that she was merely responding as we all would to seeing a stranger on a street with not many visitors or traffic.
I couldn’t help but be disappointed by his responses. White supremacy and systemic racism are so prevalent in our society that they automatically set a context of ‘diminished responsibility’ for discussions with white people about potentially racist actions and situations. When racism, overt or subtle, is a reason for Black discomfort, it’s automatically dismissed and replaced with something that lays the onus on the Black person for their feelings. I’ve experienced this since I was a young boy in Cleveland and I’m tired of it.
As a Black man, I know the confederate flag’s history as a visual warning for Blacks to stay away from a particular area or house. But that explanation would never cross his mind because he’s never been in a similar targeted and/or vulnerable position where it ever would.
Nor did it occur to him that, at a moment in time when Black people are sick and tired of being policed by white people for any and all reasons, I had been policed; questioned and made to justify my presence by a white woman, in all likelihood, because of the color of my skin. We’re all leery when new faces come into our environment, but her intent couldn’t have been more obvious. There was no “Hello” or “Hi my name is _________, what’s yours?” There was nothing except “Why are you taking pictures” and “Why are you here”.
Moreover, Ahmaud Arbery, a Black man, was chased and murdered by 3 white men while simply jogging through their neighborhood because they believed he had done something wrong. Justified or not, I often wonder if this type of interaction will be my “Arbery moment”.
But this post isn’t about her or that particular experience. This is about the dismissal of my experiences by someone who I thought would reflect the change that Blacks had hoped for after a horrific 2020 summer. Someone I hoped would at least try to understand my encounters from the perspective of the person who lived them. Sadly, he couldn’t. And he’s not the only one.
So let’s go back to the question of whether or not last summer’s protests made a difference in how most Americans view and empathize with racism and racial issues. While many have put in the effort to understand how their white privilege insulates and protects them in ways that I will never be protected, there are too many who just don’t get it and who don’t want to get it.
My partner continues to inspire me with the work he puts in to be an ally. I also have other white friends who take great pains to do the work for themselves while also trying to help others along the way. But this is way too few allies for a problem (systemic racism) that is way too immense.
I am a profoundly changed man after last year. While I understand that many want a return to the normal life we knew before Covid-19, any normality that includes more Taylors, Arberys, Floyds, Blands, Castiles (etc) is unacceptable. The dismissal of our concerns – my concerns – is unacceptable. Asking us to do the work to make you understand how systemic racism harms us and leads to having knees on our necks is unacceptable. I’m done with it.
I’ve let go of more than one friendship since last summer (and I certainly hope the friend mentioned above doesn’t become another). It’s not easy to do but is necessary for my sanity as a Black man who will no longer accept defenses for the unacceptable.
America might not be different, but I am.